Remicade Dream

I’ve been thinking a lot about the purpose of this blog. When I started it, I described it as “a musician’s life with Rheumatoid Arthritis.” Recently, though, there’s been a whole lot of RA and no music to speak of. Unfortunately, this is a pretty accurate picture of how life has been going lately.

Annoyed by this, I spent some time this week at the keyboard, working on the rewrite of my “Remicade Dream” song. (To read a little more about the original song, or if you don’t know what Remicade is, go to the Why “Remicade Dream”? page on this blog.) Although the song is about the experience of getting a Remicade infusion, it was originally written one night while I was feeling particularly sick after taking methotrexate. It had a trippy, woozy quality to it that I liked, but seemed to be missing something. So this week I played around with some more instruments and different sounds, and I wrote a whole new middle section.

This song represents a complete departure from the simple, acoustic style of “Don’t Let Me”. On the whole, I think I prefer the “Don’t Let Me” writing style, but I enjoyed working on this one. It was a chance to play with some new toys, experiment with different layers of sound, and break out musically. Since I’m still figuring out who I am as a songwriter, this is all good for me. Also, the trippy, effects-heavy style seems like a more accurate picture of my Remicade experiences – partly since I always premedicate with Zyrtec, which makes me very spacy, and partly because the whole experience is so surreal to begin with.

As a side note – my husband always drives me to my Remicade appointments and then takes our son to the park. (He stayed with me the first time because I was nervous, but I’m used to it now.) The first time we did this, he told me, “Text me when your bag’s getting low.” So I texted him the following: “Mah bag’s gettin’ low!” This has now become a catchphrase in our family – if I’m feeling particularly bad or low-energy, I tell him mah bag’s gettin’ low. So naturally, I had to work this concept into the song somewhere…

I’ve also created a new page – “The Songs”, a place where you can go to hear all of the songs on this blog without having to search through the posts.

So here is the new version of “Remicade Dream” – hope you enjoy it! It’s best listened to with headphones to get all of the strange effects.

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